I am back. It feels weird, saying that. I have so much to do, so much to write about! Best take things one at a time though. I've had the most interesting month. Everything was a blur of lessons and challenges and moments of anxiety, introspection, and appreciation of everything that I have. I have emerged learning a few valuable lessons that were crammed into a few weeks of frantic activity, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.
I've been reading the blog posts of a famous US photog who's had her share of mistakes in the past year, and it has made me realize that screwing up is definitely just a part of being human. We may cringe when we recall the times when we made mistakes and reacted accordingly, but when we step back and assess everything from a new perspective, it becomes clear that things happen not to make us feel insecure but to teach us a lesson (or lessons, whichever fits). My recent brushes with mistakes and failures has made me realize that indeed, life lessons often come to us as mistakes that frustrate and scare us, and how we react can make a world of difference in how things eventually unfold. Will that mistake make or break us? It really all depends on how we react, how we view each setback. We can choose to be beaten and feel scared or we can see each failed expectation, each stupid blunder as the Universe's way of saying that you are ready for the next challenge, so here you go.
Wishing you guys a great Friday :)
One of the very nicest things about life is the way we must regularly stop whatever it is we are doing and devote our attention to eating.
~Luciano Pavarotti and William Wright,
Pavarotti, My Own Story
I don't know why food gives such comfort, even if they can't give you hugs or tell you that things will be OK. During the most stressful times of my life, I unconsciously turned to food as a way of rewarding myself for getting through the day. I packed a few pounds, certainly, which is why I am glad that the usual sources of stress are lying low and for now I am able to breathe. But I thank God for food, glorious food, whether its homemade
paksiw or sweet and cheerful cupcakes. Edibles just make my day.
Got these cupcakes and cinnamon bun from Sans Rival. Although I go there for the silvanas and the sizzling beef steak, I didn't know that their cupcakes were also pretty good.
“This is an important lesson to remember when you're having a bad day, a bad month, or a shitty year. Things will change: you won't feel this way forever. And anyway, sometimes the hardest lessons to learn are the ones your soul needs most. I believe you can't feel real joy unless you've felt heartache. You can't have a sense of victory unless you know what it means to fail. You can't know what it's like to feel holy until you know what it's like to feel really fucking evil. And you can't be birthed again until you've died.”
--Kelly Cutrone
There are just days when I feel like I've left the major parts of my life behind and I cannot wait to get back. The stress of finals week, the uncertainty brought by things that are out of my control, and the desire to just get back into the fray that is my life outside of law school leaves me itching, and I mean itching, to write! Work and writing have always been my refuge, and frankly, this month has not been pretty, so I pretty much feel like I want to get away from it all, hide in a cave somewhere, bawl my eyes out if that will make me feel better.
I have returned to working again, although not really fully into it. I missed my clients, their warm, kind words when they receive work that they like. Stuff like that warms my heart, and they become dear friends, these clients who I've never seen or met in person, as well as clients who are here in Dumaguete. I also miss shooting since I know that I need to practice more. I met a friend for the first time today and although we just talked for less than an hour, he gave me words that encouraged me to shoot more and overcome deep-seated insecurities when it comes to using the camera. He also gave me a precious gift from a close friend of his who's been a real inspiration when it comes to shooting (excited to blog about this meeting more!!!)
Anyway, I am dying to post on a regular basis again. I still have a lot on my plate, responsibilities that need to be checked off before the week is over. I am hoping though, that Saturday next week will see me with a brighter, sunnier face, an even happier disposition, ready to enjoy what this summer has to offer :D
For now, a few photo box shots. I love making these boxes. I decorate them myself and wrap them in twine for an organic effect. I also fold the paper CD case to turn it into something cute and functional without having to use glue or tape (I thank the crafty tutorial gods for stuff like these). Part of me feels like this is the most enjoyable part of shooting, which has nothing to do with shooting at all haha! Simple pleasures--I'll take what I can get ;)
I didn't imagine that I'd be spending my Sunday morning running after a cute and absolutely adorable little guy named Hugo. When I first saw him he was in his crib, all wide-eyed and ready for his christening. Yup, Hugo traveled thousands of miles just to celebrate his christening in Dumaguete. I just found myself quite blessed to be spending a Sunday morning capturing this little guy's special day with his gorgeous (and I mean GORGEOUS!) family. Here's a 6-frame sneak peak!
Ceremony: Redemptorist Church, Dumaguete
Reception: Don Atilano
Styling: Purple Parasol
family, family, family, family, family, family, family, family, family, family, family, family
family,family, family,family,family,family
Slow months leave me out of whack for some reason. I've been a freelancer for 5 years now and I've noticed that projects dip and rise at certain months of the year. January is especially slow and although slow months give me more time to focus on other things like studying and getting other things done, there's still a part of me that itches to write just the right number of pages to make me feel like I've completed my day. It's harder to do that in slow months, which is the reason why I often do not feel like doing anything else. I'm not the only one who feels the pain of slow months, apparently. I was searching for reasons for this when I stumbled on
this post and it somehow brought a small amount of comfort knowing that other freelance writers around the world have felt the same thing (it wasn't me after all, LOL!). The great thing about Jen's post is that she listed things you can do during slow months like:
--finish projects
--start new ones
--STUDY! (added this myself, since midterms are coming and I remember ZERO from my lectures)
--finally do things that you've been putting off during the busier months, and
--just enjoy the downtime
I realized that I've been missing the blessing that comes with slow months and needed to stop stressing over the things I couldn't do and instead focus my attention on the things that I could get done. Pretty standard realization but there you go.
I also used today's downtime to finally take photos of the tea set my aunt lovingly sent from the States. She and I are avid green tea drinkers and she is one of the two people in the world who gives me my supply of green tea.
Thank you Tita Del for such a thoughtful Christmas gift!
This is the last shoot I did before we made the big jump from 2013 to 2014! The last time I shot the Tagos for their annual family portrait was two years ago with my good friend and fabulous photog Kat Banay, and I didn't realize how much I missed shooting this family until the afternoon of this shoot, when I saw how great they looked. They even brought Yoda, their newest puppy!
The Tagos know how to take portraits, and they should! They've been doing this since R and R were still dating and now with a cute little boy in tow, their annual photo sessions are as lively as ever.
Six frames!
And thank you for a house full of people I love. Amen.
-Terri Guillemets
One word: FUN! That's the Diaz family for you. When I met them I was treated to inside jokes and playful banter that immediately made me feel at ease even though it was my first time to meet them. J, a former schoolmate from high school, told me that they want portraits done since the family does not together too often, with some working abroad and J and her family living the city while the in-laws live a few hours away. As I was shooting them I was reminded of how my own family desperately needed to get itself at least one proper family portrait! This is one good-looking family, and it doesn't take a lot of persuasion for them to stand and pose, and pose well, I might add!
I loved shooting them, loved being in the middle of all that pleasant energy. It was not hard to see that this family enjoys being with each other, and that is such a great thing to witness. Family is where we laugh and jump and be silly and no one would think that it's weird because everyone's doing the same thing! And the love... it was as palpable as the rays of sunlight that was making my camera go bonkers as I followed this family around. You feel it, when you are in a place where there is love, and joy and peace. This family may not be the perfect family, but you can feel love when you are with them. And that is the most beautiful thing.
Our house is filled with smoke and I can hear the screech of firecrackers in the distance. I took the photo above from the window, a few minutes before the clock struck 12, before we made the big switch from 2013 to 2014. The dogs are tulala, especially Pip who is having his first New Year in Dumaguete. But all is well, I am here with family, and blessed with all the good things that make my heart fat and full. This year has been filled with so much happiness, lessons learned, new experiences, joy, sadness, light and love. I hope you are looking back at the year that was with joyful eyes too.
You were great, 2013!
A big HELLO to you, 2014!!!