There is a time for everything,

    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

    a time to be born and a time to die,

    a time to plant and a time to uproot,

    a time to kill and a time to heal,

    a time to tear down and a time to build,

   a time to weep and a time to laugh,

    a time to mourn and a time to dance,

  a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,

 a time to search and a time to give up,

    a time to keep and a time to throw away,

 a time to tear and a time to mend,

    a time to be silent and a time to speak,

    a time to love and a time to hate,

    a time for war and a time for peace.

--Ecclesiastes 3

Turning 32 is teaching me a lot of things. A LOT. There were times when it seemed like I was in the middle of an army boot camp that I didn't sign up for, crawling through mud, covered in bruises and bawling my eyes out like a spoiled brat. This year has been filled with those, and I know there's more to come. 

But, it has been filled with happy moments, too, very much like the R&R soldiers get after intense weeks of training. I have no idea where the military metaphors are coming from, but they are are appropriate, I guess.

Life is a battlefield. 

You hear that line in songs but you never really get to appreciate how real it is until you live it. There's the struggle to do the right thing in the midst of pain and anger, the struggle to discover who you really are apart from the people you love, the job you love, the things you love. There's the daily battle for sanity and peace in the midst of brokenness and confusion. 

Growing up, turning a year older, is tough! I learned so much in the last couple of months of being 31 than I have probably learned in college or in high school, most of them about being an adult, learning humility, learning forgiveness, learning how to be forgiven, and returning to the things that matter-- love, relationships, being at peace with who you are, not defining yourself by the people you love and love you, but defining yourself by His love (and what an amazing Love it is!) 

I learned that there is really nothing that we know, for sure. We think we know a lot when we're young and then life hits us with curveballs and we're cowering in the corner, frozen with no clue about what to do. That is OK, still, as long as we know who to turn to when we're all bruised and swollen and swearing off baseball for the last time (the metaphors, again!). 

I learned that there is a time for everything, that listening to the Voice that matters brings peace, and that peace transcends all understanding. Because there are things that matter more, things that demand sniper-like focus and attention, otherwise they'd be gone forever. I thrived as a multi-tasker in college, dabbling in this and that and doing enough just to get by, but now, I am being taught, "There is a time for everything, slow down, focus on the things that matter, on love and relationships and covenants that cannot, and should not be broken, no matter what the cost."

Man, training is hard. Learning is hard. But I guess that what's life is. Everyday is a constant revelation of things that we didn't know before, or things that we have learned but forgotten. But it is also necessary. There are days when I wake up not wanting to be where I am, impatient at the thought of things I could be doing and it takes focused, painful and even exhausting moments of reflection to remember and realign myself with the things that I should be learning, right here and right now. So I guess 32 will be a year of more learning and more growing up. I can't say that I look forward to it. It seems painful and muddy and I'm sure I'll be bruised along the way. But I will get through it and hopefully, I'll come out stronger and wiser. 

A few snapshots from our birthdays (being apart is also tough, but we make do. Bought the husband a small blueberry cheesecake that he blew from the other side of the screen. Talk about cheesy!) 

There are times when I get too comfortable in one place that I don't notice how far I am from the rest of the world. The process of preparing for big battles, taking care of relationships and changing priorities all seem like monumental tasks, and it's so easy to forget that the world is out there, beautiful and near and just waiting to be visited.  

A couple of high school friends and friends from Cebu called out of the blue and dragged me out of the house for an unexpected trip to Tierra Alta, that gorgeous place up in the clouds (a bit of an exaggeration, yes, but it's the closest you can go if you're not a mountain climber or on a plane, haha!). I was *busy* lounging in my big oversized T-shirt, relaxing with the customary tea after getting some work done when they announced that they were coming to pick me up. That was, I swear, the shortest prep time I've done in my life! No regrets, however. Tierra Alta is even more beautiful since the last time I visited, with new hotel rooms and a sky lounge. Plus, I got to meet and reconnect with old and new friends and realized how much I missed just being with people!!!  

A couple of shots taken with phone and special child Canon 50D. 

“If it’s the last kiss, we’d better make it last. 

I hope you don’t have anywhere to be, because I have the rest of my life free.” 

― Jarod Kintz

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Friends Rudylen and Fitz tied the knot at the beginning of the year (time just whizzes right by you when you're not looking!)  and it's only now that I've been able to post a few frames from that beautiful day. I assisted as the second shooter which gave me a chance to peek at how they each prepared, anticipation showing in their faces as Rudy put on make-up and Fitz put on his cuff links. I have nothing but the hope for a marriage full of adventure and love for these guys because they truly deserve it!  

Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples, Couples

Dogs are all about love. 

--Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson

This page wouldn't be enough if I wrote down all the reasons, big and small, why I love my dogs. I cannot imagine life without dogs, and to think that I was bitten by a rabid dog when I was little, which led to my parents forking over a considerable amount each month for rabies vaccines. It was a not an easy time especially for a kid but I thank God that despite that experience, I never developed a fear of dogs. The amount of love, loyalty and patience that they give you is astounding! They can teach us so much about how to live life with so much joy, appreciation for the little things like an afternoon walk or a toy, and the importance of trust in the people we love and who love us. In his piece for the New York Times, J.M. Masson said this

" "After a lifetime of affectionate regard for dogs and many years of close observation and reflection, I have reached the conclusion that dogs feel more than I do (I am not prepared to speak for other people). They feel more, and they feel more purely and more intensely. By comparison the human emotional landscape seems murky with subterfuge and ambivalence and emotional deception, intentional or not. In searching for why we are so inhibited compared with dogs, perhaps we can learn to be as direct, as honest, as straightforward, and especially as intense in our feelings as dogs are."

So true! 

Read the entire article here. :)