You have brains in your head.

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself any direction you choose.

You're on your own. 

And you know what you know.

 And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...”

― Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go!

It's a Thursday morning, and I surprised myself by waking up early despite getting into bed pretty late last night. There's so much to do and yet I realized it's all up to me to make things happen. When consequences crop up, I am responsible for that, too! So I better get going and start this day! 

Portraits {JM}

“After a while you learn the subtle difference

Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,

And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning

And company doesn't mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts

And presents aren't promises,

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes open

With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,

And you learn to build all your roads on today

Because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans

And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn...

That even sunshine burns if you get too much.

So you plant your garden and decorate your own soul,

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure... 

That you really are strong 

And you really do have worth... 

And you learn and learn... 

With every good-bye you learn.” 

― Veronica A. Shoffstall

I had no idea how to begin this post.A nice, deep quote perhaps, or a witty one-liner. I was stumped until I opened Goodreads (home of instant quotes but really, it is more than that) and I stumbled upon this poem. Not a quote, so it is a tad longer than what I am used to posting as openers for my posts, but it captured what I wanted to say perfectly, so I  decided that it would have to do. It HAD to do, actually, since nothing else would work for this post, methinks. Somehow, I read this post and felt like this was written for a friend of mine, and perfectly described all that she has gone through in the past few months. (Whew, looooong intro!) 

I caught up with a former Law School classmate for a short shoot.  I had wanted to get a portrait of her for the longest, longest time and it was also a chance for us to catch up. And catch up we did! I didn't expect to hear a lot about what had been going on with her life, since it was only a few months ago after the last semester ended. It turns out, however, that a lot  happened in the span of a couple of months. Suffice it to say that she endured one heartbreak after another, experiences that I personally dread for myself and would never, ever hope on my worst enemy. Well, they happened to her, and listening to her talk, it took a lot of willpower (and blinking) for me to prevent myself from breaking down and crying.

At one point I asked her, how did you smile and go about life during those times? It was hard, she said, but she managed, especially because her friends and family were there to rally around her. That is what's so amazing with the human heart. It can take hit after hit after hit, and yet, you find yourself standing. Battered, yes, hurting, even more so, but standing still. And in some instances, that is all it takes for you to take that one step, and that one step means you are still pressing forward. I had imagined a casual shoot for us, spent mostly talking and laughing, nothing really serious, but after learning about what happened, we agreed to incorporate some more personal stuff, a way of honoring not only the  loss but also the good that came out of it.

We managed to incorporate some personal details here and there... a shirt that belonged to a close friend, a book given to her by her mom. Sometimes it strikes me as odd, how the most important things that are dear to us are not those that we have bought for ourselves, and not even the most flashy or expensive ones. It's the things that are given out of love, or left behind by someone as a hopeful promise of a return, that eventually hold the most meaning. 

Hope.

“The very least you can do in your life is figure out what you hope for. 

And the most you can do is live inside that hope. 

Not admire it from a distance 

but live right in it, under its roof.” 

― Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

Nothing profound to say, really. It is a minute to 1 in the morning and I have been itching all day to make something beautiful (at least in my eyes) and to post it here, another reminder that this day has not gone completely to waste ( a day without art or inspiration is always a waste, I say!). This was taken during a short shoot I had with a friend and I saw these flowers by the roadside, a bed of them, and all I could think was, lavender, or purple or whatever the name of this color is, is so so so pleasing to the eye, so feminine and soft and safe and just...beautiful! I remember trampling flowers like these under my slippers when I was a child, not seeing just how beautiful they were. Funny, I guess I have adulthood to thank for this new way of looking at flowers by the roadside : ) 

Good morning everyone! 

Kwek-Kwek in Valencia

Last weekend the brother and I decided to take a short drive up to Valencia. He wanted to take water shots using his camera, while I just wanted to do a little driving.We felt hungry so we stopped by one of the food stalls that sell tempura and kwek-kwek at  the park. It was almost dark but there was a line for that stall and I figured that they must sell tasty street food. 

I ordered the kwek-kwek since I have not tried it yet. I'm familiar with tempura and fish flats but not kwek-kwek. To be honest, the fake orange color turned me off and I really did not know why it looked round and bloated.

To my surprise, it actually turned out to be delicious!!! My brother told me that kwek-kwek has eggs inside, and the best ones have full, hard-boiled eggs. Smaller versions have quail's eggs inside them which makes for smaller, bite-sized kwek-kwek balls. The orange color is because of food dyes, and although they give the balls a pretty unnatural color, they do not affect the taste whatsoever. I also liked how the vendor wrapped a bowl in plastic and placed the kwek-kwek there. It was much easier eating them off a bowl than eating the balls off a stick. I spent 40 pesos for the kwek-kwek balls and squid balls, which is pretty cheap for an afternoon snack. 

Related post on Suite101 here. 

Personal {Private Spaces}

Short, short post. I spent the last two weeks in study mode, cramming for midterms and spending some QT with the boyfriend so there was not much in terms of creativity. Writing and work even got put on the backburner for a while (which is why I'm rarin' to get back to work tomorrow!). Anyway, back to this post . 

I've always wanted to take photos of my stuff lying around in my room (for posterity's sake) and figured today was a good day as any. I also wanted to try out the new lens that JP brought with him. If not for him, I would not be able to enjoy the creamy bokeh and fast speed that you can get (without any effort whatsoever) from a 1.4. This baby is really something! JP, UDAMAN! 

Photos!!!

Family Guy love right here!!!

I love Clean. I love how light and clean it smells. I also love the unassuming light blue packaging.

There was a time when I succumbed to an obsession over boxes.
Lots of cute, artsy-fartsy boxes. It's a good thing that each just cost me P25 back when I bought them. 

I have a lot of books, but the ones here are the ones I'm either currently reading or those that I regularly flip through. 

I realize that two of my cousins gave me the two items here... my cousin who lives in China and her sister who lives in Dubai gave me these. I also realized that most of the pretty stuff I own were given to me, not bought by me. How great is that? All these pretty, cute stuff and I didn't even spend a dime on them. :) Thank God for friends. And cousins.

Colorful beads given to me by another friend. The colors remind me of her own love for bright, bold colors. The black beaded necklace was given by another friend when she came home from Dubai. 

Bought this miniature water pail from the only flea market/vintage store in the city, Alymae.
It's too small to be used as a real water pail, so it sits on my dresser stuffed with fake flowers. 

I wish, wish, wish that I could hold a mini photo-shoot with  this vintage baby as the subject. Hopefully that day will come and soon!

My mom's vintage brooch. I keep all pieces of jewelry I own in this box given to me last Christmas by the ever thoughtful brother. He knows what I like! 

 There you go. Stuff that I have on my dresser. I wanted to start this post with a deep, perhaps artsy quote about personal spaces and what-not, but I figured the pictures and a little  description would suffice for now. I didn't realize that I have some pretty cool stuff.  :D 

French Macarons... or not. :D

JP was scheduled to spend the second and last week of his winter vacation with me, after spending the weekend in CDO. I asked him to bring me a box of French Macarons, if they have them since CDO is already home to SM and Centrio and KetKai, while Dumaguete only has Robinsons so we have a pretty limited array of options when it comes to pastries here, which is really not that bad unless you really want to know what French Macarons taste like. I've been seeing photos of these pastel-colored treats all over the internet, and I believe that there are pastry shops in Bacolod that sell them, but alas, none in Dumaguete.

from howtocookthat

I was already half -thinking that there could be a teeny tiny chance that he'd bring me the macaroons that most of us know, you know, the kind made with shredded coconuts. They taste good and I've had many childhood memories of me and friends munching on tasty, fresh-from-the-oven coconut or butter macaroons, but this time I wanted 'em French and round and pastel-colored!!!

To make the long story short, dear boyfriend came bringing the shredded coconut macaroons. I couldn't get mad, even if I tried.  I imagined him walking all over the mall, looking for the macarons but not knowing what they look like. The effort was very much enough for me. Perhaps we can try French Macarons together the next time he visits. If the urge becomes too irresistible, I could just hop on a bus bound for Cebu and fix this French macaron obsession once and for all :) And besides, the macaroons he brought were so colorful and cute, I really regretted not taking any pictures of those before my brother and sister got to them. 

I enjoyed the last of his macaroon pasalubong since my brother and sister ate the entire contents of the box, except this one. And it tasted pretty good!

Ramen at Rai Rai Ken

My first  time at Rai Rai Ken was on a dull afternoon with the boyfriend on his first week here.  The side of the mall was quiet, since it was a school day and an afternoon to boot. Rai Rai Ken was empty which suited us fine. I was in the mood for something hot and warm to soothe my tummy and the boyfriend suggested we get some noodle soup. I'm not really a fan of ramen (chopsticks are NOT my friends! :O) but I agreed with him that ramen was probably the best thing for my tummy at that time. And so into Rai Rai Ken we went!

Rai Rai Ken is located along the back of Robinson's Dumaguete, along the short strip of restaurants beside Dong Juan's and Kalikaf. It stands just right across the Bingo hall (another thing I have yet to try!) and is pretty small, but they are making a habit of putting out tables outside to accommodate diners who prefer to eat al fresco. 

He suggested we get the red iced tea. It was good! I feel like red iced tea is something very Chinese and ramen-y, something they usually serve in ramen houses... of course, I could be mistaken, since I often do not go into ramen  houses that often haha!

Ah chopsticks. We never got along, and perhaps, we never will!
And for that, I thank the person who invented the fork :D

Ramen! Ramen everywhere! The miso was good though.
I was beginning to feel anxious that I would not like, but I did. I also like how fast the service was. 

:)

Will I go back? Probably when I get the munchies for some good ol' noodle soup that is not of the instant variety, haha! I'll probably try the dumplings next time, but I think I'll try practicing on my chopsticks first! :D

If you have better chopsticks skills than I do, check Rai Rai Ken out here.